gemsybobsy: (choccy)
I saw my lovely doc today, and he definitely made me feel my age (I was 31 yesterday but shhh) - he's started to encourage me to do breast examinations. Felt old, but same time, teeheeheee. He said 'breast'.

SO ANYWAY. We talked a little bit about my failbody. I told him about my concerns re: chronic fatigue, and he said that it doesn't sound like that's the case, as 'with all the things you've got going on it's no surprise you're bloody knackered', and he's not surprised that the car crash 'knocked me for six; it sounds like you were at the limit, and something had to give'. My second blood tests were clear so he thinks it was probably a viral infection that knocked it out of me for a while. My lymph nodes aren't swollen any more and I'm not as tired all the time either, so it probably was just a random illness. Thank doG for that.

Re: diet - well, of course all the good intentions went out of the window, because it was nearly my birthday and I knew I'd be getting loadsa caek and PACKETS O' SWEETS, which I did. Two massive tubs (thanks Nik) and a big box of Maltesers (classiiic birthday gift, and gone already, thanks K8 & Dad), a massive chocolate cake (classic Nan), a box of Thorntons from my auntie Della 'n' co, a bag o' lollies from Tam... not to mention the party food, of which I had leftovers, and I was trying to hurriedly consume/palm them off on to everyone else (i.e. people at GSF) yesterday, so I could go back on the Diet today. I did well - I forewent proper meals in favour of Maltesers and Thornton's for breakfast and cake for dinner - and now all I have left are the sweeties from Nik and Tam, and I'm sure they'll keep until I'm slim again, and totally free of the impulse to over-eat and sugar addiction, and will only require one or two at a time (lol, no)...

I know the trick is to stop the sugar and carb-fests, because when I did it on a trial a couple of weeks ago I felt amazing, and it really stopped that compulsive urge to overeat. Right now, after this past week of non-stop NAUGHTY foods, I have IBS all over the place and my weight has shot up, and I just know I will get diabetes or some other horrible disease before long if I carry on like this. SO. NO MORE. I actually have a picture of my Fat Self on my desktop to put me off going down to the fridge, and there are pictures of sexy svelte ladies hanging in my kitchen. DO NOT OVEREAT DAMNIT. I've put on two stone since going on pizotifen. Gurl, you gone right back to 2008 hate hate hate. :(
gemsybobsy: (walkies)

excuse me while i cry all over the place and fail to use capital letters wah wah wah
when i heard this i felt like i felt when i went to the proms or when i heard exogenesis for the first time
wah wah incoherence incoherence
one day when I feel like writing a shedload of boring essaytastic fandom bollocks (i never do these days!) i will write up exactly what a scandal in belgravia meant for me because omg the best love story ever and i omg
gemsybobsy: (eleven)
...are sitting in my car. SO MUCH STUFF. Oh my doG, what a hectic day. I scrubbed four houses, walked two dogs, did 3 loads of laundry, made a cake, washed up, hoovered out the car, loaded up the car with aforementioned belongings, then tonight I went to Nan's and made some dog beds. They're cosy. I'm sooo tired.


I think I've finally got over the board. I love all the friends I've made there, but... I dunno. Maybe it's because I've been there for nearly 10 years, and I have nothing left to say. Mind you, I don't have a lot to say at all, these days. Being happy makes you dull, it seems.
gemsybobsy: (Default)
...if I'm doing the right thing. I went drinking on Friday at my local-pub-to-be, all unexpectedly like, and had a great time. I went to Fallout last night and sat on the sofa in the front bar for most of the night, panicking about money, and I'm sitting here now panicking about money... which is silly, because I'm well on my way to scoring a few more customers in the area and I've been offered bar work, and there is some interest from another cleaning company who want a part-time housekeeper, dear, and...

I don't know. I'm wondering if running away from Southampton is really the best thing to be doing considering I've only just managed to get my life and brain on the happy train. After so many years of struggling with the devil's own depression, anxiety, social problems and the lowest of low self-esteem, I've managed to strip all of that away and uncover my true self; I'm confident, strong, and happy to be myself wherever I go. So should I risk that by changing everything again? Why do I always get bored when things are going along nicely, and want to stir things up? And why move towns, when new people are all terrifying and/or a potential bell end? I'm confident now, but I'm still wary of people. 'Bring it on! Give those fuckers a (metaphorical) taste of Teh Gemseh,' says my confidence. My shy, self-deprecating side, on the other hand - which still occasionally lurks beneath the confidence - is going, 'Oh but everyone will think you're weeeird, you won't be accepted, you can't just expect to make more friends by moving to another town, you won't like it, you're going to have to put yourself out there to have a good time and you're too lame...'

Doubting doubts, plz to be off. I love my new house. I still can't bring myself to tell you guys about it though, or show anyone the pictures of it. But I will! My application's at the referencing stage, and should find out this week if it's successful. I was told that it should all be fine, and the estate agent asked me if I wanted to meet the landlady on Wednesday, which is awesome. So they obviously don't foresee a problem. Still pooing bricks though.


Sep. 30th, 2011 12:05 am
gemsybobsy: (ballet)
I'm so happy, and I'm really loving this late summer. It's so hot! I reckon it was all down to us you know; we dragged it home from Spain!

House: I filled in all the forms and discussed everything with my folks tonight (they were impressed with my epic spreadsheets!) I'm going to the estate agents tomorrow to hand it all in... exciiite!

Steve said I didn't sound very enthusiastic when we were talking about it on the phone. I guess I'm trying not to get my hopes up. COME OOON. SAY YES ALREADY SO I CAN GO TO IKEA. No but seriously, I've got this superstitious feeling that if I get too excited and start telling everyone about the house and SHOPPIIING and planning colours of towels etc. that they'll reject my application. But, I have awesome guarantors and a good accounts prediction for the coming months, so... crossing all body parts.

I'm also getting a gigantic tax credits payment.

Best. Year. Ever.
gemsybobsy: (gaga)
Right you guys. Problem: Southampton blows and I want to move to Salisbury. I really don't want to live in a house-share; I'm thirty years old and I want space to myself, in which to be free and naked arty and grow plants and play music and have sophisticated, relaxed dinner parties. I'm not desperate to move out NOW because, really, I need to wait until I have enough money in the bank. I don't currently have enough money in the bank. Lolz.

As is often typical when one has no coin, I saw my dream house on RightMove. I ranted to everybody how it's just SO NOT FAIR that rent is so expensive, and asked myself/everyone on Facebook how I could boost my income enough to be able to rent on my own, etc. Could I do it? At the moment, with me being this lazy? No. But if I worked my arse off? Yes. I realised that I am going to have to just suck it up and work my arse off, because I need to earn twice as much as everyone else because I have to pay twice as much rent as everyone else, because I'm a terminal singleton, and that's how we have to roll.

YES, THIS HOUSE? SHE IS GORGEOUS. It's full of old shite furniture, and the kitchen is from the '70s, it only has electric heating and no phone-lines or aerial points. I LOVE IT. Right in the middle of Salisbury, on the river, with a little courtyard garden. £695pcm. Far too much dosh for me. But something about it made it feel so perfect that I sent off an e-mail telling the estate agents that I loved the look of the place, and would they accept dogs? They said yes straight away. JOY. So then, I put my sensible head on and I told them that I was only enquiring out of vague interest and that I can't really afford that much rent, but I was so pleasantly surprised that they'd said yes to pets, that now I was torn. After some thought I told them that I'd maybe be interested, if the rent was around £600pcm. They said they'd ask the landlady, and get back to me. The next morning they phoned me back and said that the landlady would definitely consider bringing down the price, that they wanted a single occupant such as myself, and would rather have the right person in there even if it means they get less money. Would I like to go and view it? OH YES. The vibes were so right that I swallowed my I AM HARDWORKING INDEPENDENT DAUGHTER pride and asked Mother and Paul if they could sub me the deposit. We discussed, they said yes (if I pay it back haha), and agreed to meet me for the viewing (which was on the morning before I went to Spain). I was so excited... that I slept in and missed the appointment. OH LOL FAIL. I was most upset, but Mum & Paul had a look around it anyway, and confirmed its gorgeousity.

So. I buggered off to Spain, leaving the negotiation in their hands (I offered £625, if they included the council tax in that) and they said they'd get back to me on the Monday. They did; but they turned down my offer. FUCKEN... BOO. They suddenly wanted £675! WTF? So I put it out of my mind, not meant to be, kind of relieved 'cause I would've been broke! I enjoyed my holiday and came home. Last night, it had gone down to £650 on RightMove. WTF MOAR? This morning, the agent called me and said the landlady wanted me to reconsider, as she'd had no other interest apart from this one fussy bint who wanted them to buy her a hoover. The agent suggested £615, which, with council tax, would bring me up to ~£700. Which would make it £100 cheaper than the original asking price. So now I'm torn again. I'm going to look at it tomorrow. If I fall in love with the place, I might just go for it. I've had three phone calls just today about cleaning in Salisbury. It seems that's where the money is!



Jul. 5th, 2011 09:36 pm
gemsybobsy: (sherlock3)

Well, I am busy. To the point of having 'DO NOTHING' actually written in my diary on a couple of Saturdays. Normally being busy means lots of writing in this here journal, but I'm not really that into it at the moment. I feel quite boring; all I can think to write is lists. I need some memes or something to get back into the habit of writing properly, or summink.

This is what I've been doing, anyway:

  • Cleaning. So much cleaning, in fact, that my fingers have started to stick down and I have had to go and buy a shiatsu cushion. Which is amazing, but still...
  • Skiving ballet, and going to ballet, depending on how much cleaning was or wasn't required that week...
  • Walking naughty, naughty dogs. *glares at Alfie*
  • Went out for a lovely meal on Fathers' Day with both my 'dads', and Dhana and Stevie's dad, which was absolutely lovely. Love how my lovely family are able to always be lovely to each other.

  • MOTing the Hundwagen, replacing the smashed-in rear light, getting a new lambda sensor and mirror and, most importantly, novelty stickers for the rear window. Have since somehow smashed in the rear light again.
  • Some cooking! I made scones and pizza from scratch, and it was all much appreciated.

  • Dubbin' in Dorset, with both of my nieces and their mum and dad, plus my dad, and some mates. We sat around in tents and barbequed and drank beer and looked at Volkswagens of all shapes and sizes.

  • Headlined two venues with Dreams Divide in one weekend! *cough*BUYTHEALBUM*cough*

  • Discovered the best sweet shop ever in Salisbury, and now I really want to move there. To the actual sweet shop.
  • Saw Combichrist at the Talking Heads, which was splendid.
  • Went shopping in town with Tam and Steve, larked about a lot; ended up in the pub drinking too much while talking about diets.
  • Hanging out with Steve a lot, watching lots of TV and stuff, and Sarah came over for a spot of Torchwood one night too.

Coming up:

  • Sonisphere this weekend! I must pack.
  • A couple of cinema trips (Third Star and Harry) and a Dungeon trip on the 16th - Jeannie's got a babysitter!
  • America! Fuck yeah!
  • SOUNDGARDEN. IN AMERICA. WITH [ profile] rhymeswithbooze. OH SHHH-
  • The continuation of the Dreams Divide July Tour (Southampton & Reading - not headlining this time though).
  • Stevie's first birthday!
  • Devin Townsend at the Heads. ACOUSTIC. OMG. I still need to get tickets though.
  • Nan & Grandad's 50th wedding anniversary. Awww.
  • Prom 44 at the Albert Hall.
  • Reading? Depends on money, of course. And ticket availability. I am avoiding looking at Musebay because I know I'll be tempted to use the dreaded credit card (dreadit card?)...
  • MY TWO BIRTHDAY PARTIES. I am excite. One is going to be at the Bridge, and the other is an invited gatecrash of Chris & Pete's wedding. Hahaha.
  • A swap party at Sarah's for charideeee.
  • More Dreams Divide gigs. One at CyberSonik festival in Camden. :D
  • And One in Berlin. Lol.

So, enough to be getting on with I think, and more than enough to have to work hard to raise money for *rubs lower back*. I am determined to have 30 birthday parties before next year's planned extreme frugality. Hell yeaaah. 

Well hello!

May. 9th, 2011 11:07 pm
gemsybobsy: (files1)
So, we had a very non-eventful album release. Most of the people who said they were going to buy it didn't buy it. Bastards. Three reviews so far; two negative, one positive. Meh. Anti-climax. Maybe we should've done a launch night or something. We have two gigs coming up in July, so hopefully that'll sell some more. We need to make our costs back from digital sales so we can get some damn CDs pressed!

I am having such a lovely time at the moment, though. Really enjoying myself. I went to see DFA1979 at the Forum last week (amazing), walked across the Thames in the evening sunshine, looked after my beautiful nieces, saw Ginger and Jackdaw4 on Saturday night at the Talking Heads (awesome) and then I sleepwalked. I don't even. I woke up in the morning at the wrong end of my bed, my clothes were all over the floor, my mirror was moved across the room and my wardrobe door had been forcefully removed from the rest of the wardrobe. I... don't even. I think I might've fallen on it while looking for the loo in my sleep? So weird. Nothing like that has ever happened to me before. I usually sleep really lightly and stay really still and boring. So what the hell, please?

It sucks that I'll never find out the whole truth. Booo. Anyway: I've paid the deposit for my Spanish holiday! So exciting! I'm shopping on eBay right now for schnauzer-related things. I want cute pictures and earrings with Floyds on them! I bought this lovely print. It will look so pretty in our lounge.
gemsybobsy: (travel)
24th April: Firebird, Joiners
29th April: Cabin Pressure/Live Cumberbatching
4th May: DFA1979, Kentish Town
7th May: Ginger at Talking Heads
13th May: Hannah's hen do
22nd May: earthtone9, London
4th June: Hannah and Jason's wedding
24th June: Dubbin' in Dorset
28th June: Combichrist
1st July: Dreams Divide gig in Salisbury
2nd July: Dreams Divide gig in Croydon
8th July: Sonisphere
18th-24th July: LA!!!
26th July: New Forest Show (maybe)
27th July: Dreams Divide gig at Talking Heads (Modulate)
28th August: Reading? Possible...
2nd September: My birthday party at the Bridge
3rd September: Chris & Pete's wedding, my birthday
17th September: Holidaaay. Lovely posh Spanish villa, please. With hot-tub.
October: Another Dreams Divide gig.
November: Berlin.
gemsybobsy: (devy)
I keep opening this pesky Post an Entry box but realise I have far too much to say and too little at the same time. Hmmm. That sounds familiar; I'm sure I've said that before. Aaanyway, MARCH.

My littlest niece, Stevie, was christened on the 20th.

She looks a bit sketched out here but she is the smiliest baby in the world. She's got such a lovely character already! She's got... like... an aura of sensitive cheeriness. Or summink. It was a lovely day, in lovely Wilton, with lots of sunshine and daffodils and windmills and cake.

I showed Steve Frankenstein at the cinema and we both emerged rather speechless and emotional. It seemed to be more moving the second time, although not as awesome as it was seeing it in the flesh. I guess more of the meaning of the lines went in this time. And then of course I saw it again (hell yeah) with Anna and Jon - Ben was playing Frankenstein this time, with his mad skillz and frock-coated glory. I told Facebook: 'I swear he is made of precious ginger stardust.' It's TRUE.

Max & Aino came to town for an Ikea mission and dinner (yay), I've been going out and eating lots of doughnuts and cheese scones with Steve and going to Nik's for dinner (they do food now at the Greyhound!) and generally eating out FAR TOO MUCH (yay). I've also had a bad cold (boo), missed too much ballet (boo), joined another band (yay), business is slow (boo, but also yay), and decided to go swimming more and stop eating shite so I can finally shift this darn flab from my arse (yay).

Then on the 26th I decided I wanted to flounce around Selfridges, motherlovers, and buy some goddamn posh-ass makeup. So I went, and got caught right in the middle of that protest thingy. Squishy. And then there were engineering works on the bleedin' train. Remind me to check news and trains and things more often, okay? Ta. I headed for Islington and ate some damn cheese scones. Then I met [ profile] bossmew for some lolz, of which there were many.

Then I went on stage with Devin Townsend.

gemsybobsy: (ben)

Oh, there's nothing like wondering around the South Bank and foyer of the National Theatre, darlings, with your best [ profile] bossmew talking about walls of vaginas, the 'c' word, the current OMG!RACEST shenanigans going down at Midsomer Murders and how much we love "her off of My Family" and 'that bloke, you know. Ian. Ian McGandalf. And that James McAfee.' And talking in bad South London accents, laaahke, and giggling like schoolgirls about we 'liked that fackin’ Johnny Lee Miller back when he was fit' and about our barely-contained (or disguised) excitement at the prospect of being Cumberbatched IRL from only this far away.

'We need a computer game based on acting. Shakespeare Hero.'
'Shakespeare... Idol.'
'Pinter Idol.'
'Haha. What would they do, stand on stage and be like, *awkward silence*...?'
*winning loltears*
'I love the fact that everybody here is probably thinking we're terribly loud and uncouth and lowbrow, not even knowing that we've just made a Pinter joke.'

We had AMAZING seats. So close. Oh, Benedict. Oh. As you probably know, my fangull status was already well-implemented with all the grammar Nazi-ing, hilarious attempts at stocking the fridge and cautiousness around shoes, and then I fell in love when I realised he was a ginger. But now? I am besotted. He blew my mind. He is… just... I want to go again, and I don't even know if I liked the play.


Then we loitered outside the stage door, being uncouth of course (I wondered aloud if Ben would let me touch his hair, but we decided that asking him that question wouldn't just be uncouth - it would be slightly rapey) and the other people waiting were laughing as we narrated the TV we could see through the doors. A lady came down and said that Ben wasn't coming out to play, because he was having a party. Promptly, over half the group disappeared. Cumberbitches gotta eat chocolate biscuits. So, the remaining six of us waited to see if Johnny or anyone else came down, but it must've been a good party. Boo. Kyra: 'So he can't be arsed to see us because he's getting pissed? What a twat. He can fack off if he thinks I'm buying the next Sherlock DVD. I'm just gonna give Mark Gatiss a fiver.'

Then we lol'd our way to Waterloo and I gave a homeless dude half of my chocolate bar and ate some salt & vinegar Squares on the train the end omg. HAPPY BIRTHDAY KYRA AND FANKS FOR A FACKIN' AWESOME DAY!


Oct. 12th, 2010 11:33 pm
gemsybobsy: (butterflies)
I just got an e-mail from the OU and for a minute there I thought it was my last assignment being marked but it was just reminding me to make sure my TMA scores are showing up okay on my StudentHome page. Argh, don't DO THAT TO ME. I want to knooow what I gooot...

I have the lurgy. Boo. Well, I did yesterday and a bit of today. I have so much catching up to do tomorrow because of it. I missed all my dancings today. Double boo. How interesting this entry is.

Oh I want to mention Claire Rayner, too. Because she died today, and she was awesome. :(

My Parents

Aug. 25th, 2010 12:45 am
gemsybobsy: (maynard)
Geoff and Karen. Dad's from Middlesbrough, Mum's family are from round 'ere mush. Forest folk. Dad is very laid back and a lot like me, happy to be happy. He loves fishing, walking his dog Meg in the Forest, camping, outdoorsy stuff. The beach. Surfing and kayaking. He's arty, and makes stuff out of driftwood and loves rock 'n' roll. Led Zep and Rainbow and stuff. For his 50th birthday last year we had a big festival. He was a total rocker with long hair when Mum met him. My nan says he was a lazy bugger back in the day. Not now though! He works too hard; shift work in a chemical plant. So he knows a bit about chemistry. My dad knows a lot of facts and taught me loads of stuff when I was a kid. Still does actually. I think I look like my dad. My mum & dad split up when I was 15. He met Katy down the pub and has been with her for... haha I dunno. Over ten years. She's only four years older than me but that's never been a problem. We have a lovely relationship and always have, even though it must have been so daunting for her, taking on us lot. Haha. Love Katoir.

Daddy & Katy

Mum's a bit more outgoing than Dad. She's loud, chatty... a bit harsh sometimes, haha. She has the loudest laugh in the world. Cackle! She is so funny to go drinking with. She gets frustrated with me I think. I over-think everything, and am self-consciousness. She's the epitome of extrovert, haha. She's pretty (my friends used to call her a MILF), blonde and awesome. She always taught me to be loud and proud and be myself and just punch anyone who upsets me in the damn face. She doesn't see the point in being miserable about anything, or dwelling on stuff that happened in the past. She has a distinctive Mum Smell. I think it's Chanel No. 5? Mum is fifty just after I turn thirty, so next year. She started her career as a cleaner when us kids were small and she's a director of the company now. She's been going out with Paul for ten years today! Paul is hilarious and lovely. Especially when drunk. She did go out with some knobbers so it took me a while to get used to Paul, but I grew to love him like another dad.

Mummy & Paul

moar meame lawl )

A nice day. Epic Forest walkies, then more car troubles, so I hung out in the garage for a while and blagged some home made honey from my auntie Chris, for the WIN. Visited my nan and grandad, blagged a sunflower head in a vase (?) some apple crumble and a Dime bar. Sorted. Left an anniversary Nice Present of designer chocolates and a card in Mum & Paul's porch, made a sugar-free failcake and... heard the first mix of one of our album tracks. SHIZZAM. It's so awesome. Cannot wait to share it with the world!



Aug. 5th, 2010 10:16 pm
gemsybobsy: (book)
In the last week I have worked through four chapters of my course (I was so behind haha), read four not very short short stories, read/listened to/dissected The Burial at Thebes, found spare moments to read bits of Wuthering Heights (boring so far) and Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close (best ever and I'm only half way through), went to Dave and Sarah's for a barbecue, went to the Joiners (ohyes, omg brave) to see my cousin Alex play guitar and sing and generally kick rock arse, discovered and stole the back catalogue (by mistake) of two new bands, de-flea'd the canines who live with me (errr, lurgy, errr), visited and kissed my new tiny piece of lovely niece, Stevie Ellen Mary McNulty (born Monday 2nd August 2010, 8lb 15oz). I also did a lot of shopping, dog walking, cleaning, driving and... laundry.

I'm still bored. All these things and I can't think of anything to talk about. Business is great though! I've paid August's rent already and am now saving up for a Ford Transit.



Jul. 17th, 2010 11:50 am
gemsybobsy: (gaga)
Business expansion ideas. Help!

Right. I dunno what to do. I am getting more and more interest, and it's getting to the stage where I'm going to be struggling to fit everybody in. Part of me wants to keep saying YES YES YES and take them all on and expaaaaaand, because I'm not kidding but I want to make some actual money for once in my life and this is my chance. The other part of me says, 'Nooo, keep it small, you're living just about stress-free and you're happy and earning just enough, so just say no!' I also want to move over the other side of the city. I really, really do. I think I want M&M to be Waterside & New Forest business, rather than a Southampton business. Or at least, that's where I want to live. Mostly because I'm bloody fed up of traffic lights.

So the options are pretty much like,

Option 1. Turn down future business and carry on as I am; hoping that gradually word of mouth spreads over Hythe and I lose some of the regulars over the east side of town, and therefore end up working more in Hythe and just going as far as Shirley, which would be ideal - and would justify moving that way. I could carry on as I am now, with my not-too-shabby lifestyle. I will never be able to afford to buy a house unless I shack up with some chump, and I will never be able to rent anywhere with two dogs. So the only solution is keep business bubbling away as it is, with this same amount of income each month (a standard full-time wage, I believe), and perhaps rent some commercial premises in Hythe (and live there in a caravan!) This seems a bit like a fun idea, until you consider that the cheapest, tiniest commercial premises seem to be the same amount of monthly rent as a 2-bed house... and then it doesn't seem very fair.

Option 2. Carry on expanding. Join a business network group in Hythe and try to get tons of business over that way, and take on an employee to cover the Eastsiiiide round, and... just keep it growing? Take on more employees to cover future 'rounds'? I could end up with teams! This is the only way I'm likely to ever be rich enough to be able to live anywhere, ever. But it's also likely to be hassle and worry and stress and I don't deal... being my own boss was supposed to be a great, chilled lifestyle and I'm worried that turning it into a 'business' will feck me up in the brainz. But on the other hand, one day I might be able to have a team of cleaners, and be able to sit in head office (or on my epic, 12-acre farm) with daycare dogs and... SWIMMING POOL.

Other problems include the fact that being 'a business' puts me in direct competition with The Enemy and all that. The world of dog walking/pet care businesses seems to be quite a bitchy competitive world that I don't really wanna be part of. I wouldn't be a rip-off franchise merchant like them though. Also, there are TONS of dog walkers in the Hythe/Waterside area, so it would be better for me financially to stay over this side of Southampton. I guess that's why I'm wanting to take people on, so they can cover it while I mosey about in the Forest. Haha. So many pros, so many cons.


gemsybobsy: (Default)

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