Maybe it'll help to write it down, Idk.

[gemsybobsy]

I just can't switch off. So ANNOYING. I never get to sleep each night until I'm completely physically PWNED (so like, 4am) then I'm awake every 3-4 hours, tossing and turning and having completely BENDY dreams. It's not like I'm even thinking of anything in particular, it's just stuff. STUFF STUFF. Like, I'm thinking of my shopping list in my sleep and wake myself up giving myself mental notes about tomorrow's work plans. Or like, 'Oh btw Gemsy, before you drive off to so-and-so's gaff remember to top up the water'. Boring stuff. It's ridiculous.

This and my stupid physical symptoms are pretty much constant and normal, but sometimes it just builds up a little bit too much and then it completely bends up my brain and then bad times happen so I need to stoppit. Nippit in the bud. So for the last... ages, I've been staying in a lot, hiding from this society thing people keep on about, staying in mah bubble and indulging my personal pleasures as it were... , but I'm still like FLEAAARGH. Meditation, or something, is what I need to do. I really do not want to go back into another period of downery, thanks. My doctor keeps throwing relaxy tablets at me but none of them do fuckity all. It seems to just be the way I am. I don't feel particularly unhappy, or anything. Just a bit too... restless. I'll occasionally feel the other extreme though... like, nothing seems worth doing, but I feel like I should make an effort, but I can't make the effort, and I get frustrated because I can't make the effort...

LMAO iTunes just belted my lugs with some pretty hardcore d&b and my brain went WOAHYEAH. I clearly need some more phat beats in my life.

I feel like I need a passion, or something. Which is totally ridiculous because I have THOUSANDS of things I love doing and I'm always busy. But there isn't really anything that really keeps my attention. Nothing is enough! I need something to get really stuck into that takes up ALL my time.

Comments

[jupiter-erased.livejournal.com]

You need to travel.
It's part of the human drive, we ARE still cave people in the end and the downside of this is the need to abandon our cave in search of new hunting ground.

In my case, it's finding new things to make, but I think in your case, you have itchy feet and need to go on an adventure.
*hugs*

[thebarkside.livejournal.com]

That's a great idea but I have to save moneys for a flat, argh. I dunno if that's ever going to happen, but it kind of needs to... Necessities, olol. I've got loads of gigs coming up, argh I need to stop buying gig tickets...

[amdark.livejournal.com]

:( <3



Have you tried yoga?

Life is at least 25% better when I bother to do it. You'd be well good at it as well, with your ballet-ness.

Wears me out, relaxes my mind and body and sends me off to sleep. Mmm..

I know it's not that simple, ha. But Idk. Every little halps? Plus, it's fun and I want to spread the fun.

[thebarkside.livejournal.com]

There is a lady who teaches yoga between our ballet classes, and sometimes it's quite tempting to join in, but I haven't yet! It does sound awesome, and I could do with improving my core strength for ballet purposes. I might give it a go, thanks! x

[cha-mel-eon.livejournal.com]

Hmmm, I bet the overactive mind will help with your OU stuff though!

[thebarkside.livejournal.com]

Yeah it's all right, but I still end up leaving my uni stuff till the last minute and panicking. Hopefully the next course I do will be more my sort of thing though.

[rhymeswithbooze.livejournal.com]

I had two dreams featuring Nate and David Fisher in one night. WTF?

That is all.

[thebarkside.livejournal.com]

That's quite amazing. Haha! I am jealous.