gemsybobsy (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
gemsybobsy) wrote2007-09-15 02:07 pm
gemsybobsy) wrote2007-09-15 02:07 pm
Future space humans
I had an interesting dream last night about a future colony of space humans. I looked for some YouTubes for those words.
This video is intriguing. The spelling is atrocious but the pictures are cool. The music is very pretty. The comments (of all things, about whether or not sex will be obsolete) are just hilarious. And how odd that I have stumbled across this video and, in particular, those comments. Just as I was preparing to try and arrange the thoughts in my head about being an asexual "woman". It's given me a context, if you will.
I love the fact that it is often suggested that humans will eventually evolve into pure consciousness. Bundles of funky conscious energy. I like it. It's not that implausible, really. On a shorter scale some people believe this now; not necessarily as a race, but that this will happen to each of us after death. Beings of passionate life-force, energy, strong, immortal and almighty. We'll have no need to be reassured, no real evilness, just pure love, peace and... I dunno, what's another cheesy word... Endeavour. Yes. That are being a good word. Yeah, just... all of the bitches, moans and quirks but none of the real fallbacks of humanity. I like the sound of that. As long as we can still have a laugh, I'm up for anything, me. And yeah, this idea that we're evolving that way is prominent in lots of culture, religions and even in science these days... I'm sure you've heard it nuff times.
Yet it does always crack me up when someone dares mention that we will be sexless, and everyone stops the discussion and says, "Er, no, that's not humanity." You can say you won't have to eat or drink or any other pleasures of the flesh, but as soon as you mention that (although they may deeply emotionally connected with everyone else and will still be able to feel and love) they'll no longer need to have sex, it's suddenly, "Actually no, you can jog on, chap! I wanna get laid!" But again, it's not implausible. Scientists are already cloning and artificially inseminating and what have you, so who's to say they haven't already got secret tanks full of embryos, artifically created from a dash of DNA off of someone's left nipple? I dunno, it's interesting, and I do think it's possible that we will evolve in that way and will no longer have any need for reproductive parts, and we'll be alright about it.
I think that is a damn cool concept. Modern science FTW.
And this gets even cooler, because if we don't need to have sex, we don't need to have genders. Those can fuck off, srsly. If we're all having a laugh, listening to some choons and flying about the universe as bubbles, I won't have to worry about what I look like! w00t!
Right, this is gonna be hard to explain. Right. I am now a woman (I'm offically grown up, apparently, now I'm over 25!) But still, most of the time, I don't feel like one; I went through a stage (several) of wishing I was a man, my "inner monologue" has always been male and when playacting as a kid or whatever I've always been a male character. I still do that in my head. My mind wanders while I'm out walking and I pretend I'm somewhere else and someone else and that person is usually male. And like, whenever I've said that I'd "fancied" someone famous or whatever it's more often or not that I find them incredibly cool and want to be like them. So anyway. I've always felt like a proper 50-50 mixture and saw myself as just a person.
I thought I'd grow out of that and embrace my femininity when I reached adulthood, but nah. In the past I've felt like I didn't come out like I was supposed to. All through my childhood and teens I wanted to just be seen as "a person" and not "a girl", so I had bobbed and then cropped hair and built dens and played drums and rode bikes. I liked girly stuff too but I didn't want to just be judged as a girl, if that makes sense. I loved wearing skirts and dresses at dancing shows and in private, but when I was out playing or hanging out with friends, I felt self-conscious. So I wore combats and baggy t-shirts until I got to the age of 18 and realised that that sort of thing didn't flatter my adult shape; it just made me look butch. I didn't want to look like a girly girl, but neither did I want to look like a lesbian. So I lost a load of weight and got down to 10 stone (which is really skinny for me) and lost loads of boobage and generally loved my new athletic shape. But I still had cropped hair which I loved, but I realised that because my shoulders are really broad my head still looked like a pea on a fork, and the only way I could balance that out was by having big hair. So I grew my hair again and made it big and lost my new skinny figure (my weight fluctuates like mad!) and my curves and boobs came back and I just gave up and conformed to being a typical woman so I could go to work in an office and not be asked too many questions. Boys were more interested in me and girls finally admitted that I looked gash with short hair. Thanks for the heads up. Hahaha....
Anyway, now that I work alone and hang out with dogs and the only people I meet are people who shout at me in parks and customers who think I'm a lesbian anyway, so I'm thinking about going all androgynous again. I'm thinking maybe get my athletic dancer figure back, get a breast reduction and shave my head. Lolz. Not really. But in an ideal world... I don't want to look "sexy" or "attractive" or be "what boys want" in a woman. I want to look beautiful but I don't know what that is. And I'm not reallybothered enough about it to try and achieve it? I'd rather spend my time and money on other things. I dunno. I guess I want to be neutral. Like, y'know with some animals (I'm thinking of dogs but there's loads more really) you can't tell what sex they are until you look between their legs, yet they're all different and cool and unique in some way? I kinda wish humans were like that.
Grrr. I guess I just hate being defined by what's between my legs! I've always joked that I don't have a bajingo. O_o "I'm a girl but was born sans vagine." I don't feel like a proper woman. I don't feel like I fit in with the female community. Haha. I've been told that there are certain feelings that are usual for an average heterosexual woman to feel by now. I should have a boyfriend. Medical staff are always shocked when I tell them I don't have sex. I've had to explain my way out of not counting my libido as a depression measurer (as I don't have one as such anyway), not needing a smear test, not needing the Pill and not needing a free (!) chlamidya test.
It's all so confusing. I still feel like a naïve child half the time and I still don't know whether it's a subconscious decision I've made - I don't want sex! Ever! - or whether it's just because I haven't met anyone yet that I want to be intimate with. But on the whole, I've tried, and I am decidedly "meh" about the whole thing.
I think I'm writing about all of this now because I'm suddenly scared about getting older and being alone. The other day I was scribbling in my paper diary about not knowing whether or not I want to get married. And yesterday on Muse we were talking about whether or not people settle down with someone who doesn't reach their original ideals just 'cause they're running out of time. I dunno. But by my age, females are supposed to have/want to have a big wedding day, and a gizillion babies. And even if they don't want that, they still want one particular man or woman who will stick by them, make them feel good, treat them well, fall completely in love with them and never leave their side until they die with them.
I don't think I want that. I really, really don't. I often think I do, when I witness friends and family members who are happy having chosen the "domestic" path (God bless you Doctor for coining that phrase!) But in all honesty, I just don't. I don't want to have to rely on one person to make me feel whole. I want to feel whole myself, and be close to others and spend my time earning money doing something I enjoy and spending the earnings on memories rather than families and houses that will fall to bits anyway and I want to have fun and travel and love and be loved and meet amazing unique people and make the most of having this body, as wonky and "overly feminine" as it is. :p
Woah.
x
This video is intriguing. The spelling is atrocious but the pictures are cool. The music is very pretty. The comments (of all things, about whether or not sex will be obsolete) are just hilarious. And how odd that I have stumbled across this video and, in particular, those comments. Just as I was preparing to try and arrange the thoughts in my head about being an asexual "woman". It's given me a context, if you will.
I love the fact that it is often suggested that humans will eventually evolve into pure consciousness. Bundles of funky conscious energy. I like it. It's not that implausible, really. On a shorter scale some people believe this now; not necessarily as a race, but that this will happen to each of us after death. Beings of passionate life-force, energy, strong, immortal and almighty. We'll have no need to be reassured, no real evilness, just pure love, peace and... I dunno, what's another cheesy word... Endeavour. Yes. That are being a good word. Yeah, just... all of the bitches, moans and quirks but none of the real fallbacks of humanity. I like the sound of that. As long as we can still have a laugh, I'm up for anything, me. And yeah, this idea that we're evolving that way is prominent in lots of culture, religions and even in science these days... I'm sure you've heard it nuff times.
Yet it does always crack me up when someone dares mention that we will be sexless, and everyone stops the discussion and says, "Er, no, that's not humanity." You can say you won't have to eat or drink or any other pleasures of the flesh, but as soon as you mention that (although they may deeply emotionally connected with everyone else and will still be able to feel and love) they'll no longer need to have sex, it's suddenly, "Actually no, you can jog on, chap! I wanna get laid!" But again, it's not implausible. Scientists are already cloning and artificially inseminating and what have you, so who's to say they haven't already got secret tanks full of embryos, artifically created from a dash of DNA off of someone's left nipple? I dunno, it's interesting, and I do think it's possible that we will evolve in that way and will no longer have any need for reproductive parts, and we'll be alright about it.
I think that is a damn cool concept. Modern science FTW.
And this gets even cooler, because if we don't need to have sex, we don't need to have genders. Those can fuck off, srsly. If we're all having a laugh, listening to some choons and flying about the universe as bubbles, I won't have to worry about what I look like! w00t!
Right, this is gonna be hard to explain. Right. I am now a woman (I'm offically grown up, apparently, now I'm over 25!) But still, most of the time, I don't feel like one; I went through a stage (several) of wishing I was a man, my "inner monologue" has always been male and when playacting as a kid or whatever I've always been a male character. I still do that in my head. My mind wanders while I'm out walking and I pretend I'm somewhere else and someone else and that person is usually male. And like, whenever I've said that I'd "fancied" someone famous or whatever it's more often or not that I find them incredibly cool and want to be like them. So anyway. I've always felt like a proper 50-50 mixture and saw myself as just a person.
I thought I'd grow out of that and embrace my femininity when I reached adulthood, but nah. In the past I've felt like I didn't come out like I was supposed to. All through my childhood and teens I wanted to just be seen as "a person" and not "a girl", so I had bobbed and then cropped hair and built dens and played drums and rode bikes. I liked girly stuff too but I didn't want to just be judged as a girl, if that makes sense. I loved wearing skirts and dresses at dancing shows and in private, but when I was out playing or hanging out with friends, I felt self-conscious. So I wore combats and baggy t-shirts until I got to the age of 18 and realised that that sort of thing didn't flatter my adult shape; it just made me look butch. I didn't want to look like a girly girl, but neither did I want to look like a lesbian. So I lost a load of weight and got down to 10 stone (which is really skinny for me) and lost loads of boobage and generally loved my new athletic shape. But I still had cropped hair which I loved, but I realised that because my shoulders are really broad my head still looked like a pea on a fork, and the only way I could balance that out was by having big hair. So I grew my hair again and made it big and lost my new skinny figure (my weight fluctuates like mad!) and my curves and boobs came back and I just gave up and conformed to being a typical woman so I could go to work in an office and not be asked too many questions. Boys were more interested in me and girls finally admitted that I looked gash with short hair. Thanks for the heads up. Hahaha....
Anyway, now that I work alone and hang out with dogs and the only people I meet are people who shout at me in parks and customers who think I'm a lesbian anyway, so I'm thinking about going all androgynous again. I'm thinking maybe get my athletic dancer figure back, get a breast reduction and shave my head. Lolz. Not really. But in an ideal world... I don't want to look "sexy" or "attractive" or be "what boys want" in a woman. I want to look beautiful but I don't know what that is. And I'm not reallybothered enough about it to try and achieve it? I'd rather spend my time and money on other things. I dunno. I guess I want to be neutral. Like, y'know with some animals (I'm thinking of dogs but there's loads more really) you can't tell what sex they are until you look between their legs, yet they're all different and cool and unique in some way? I kinda wish humans were like that.
Grrr. I guess I just hate being defined by what's between my legs! I've always joked that I don't have a bajingo. O_o "I'm a girl but was born sans vagine." I don't feel like a proper woman. I don't feel like I fit in with the female community. Haha. I've been told that there are certain feelings that are usual for an average heterosexual woman to feel by now. I should have a boyfriend. Medical staff are always shocked when I tell them I don't have sex. I've had to explain my way out of not counting my libido as a depression measurer (as I don't have one as such anyway), not needing a smear test, not needing the Pill and not needing a free (!) chlamidya test.
It's all so confusing. I still feel like a naïve child half the time and I still don't know whether it's a subconscious decision I've made - I don't want sex! Ever! - or whether it's just because I haven't met anyone yet that I want to be intimate with. But on the whole, I've tried, and I am decidedly "meh" about the whole thing.
I think I'm writing about all of this now because I'm suddenly scared about getting older and being alone. The other day I was scribbling in my paper diary about not knowing whether or not I want to get married. And yesterday on Muse we were talking about whether or not people settle down with someone who doesn't reach their original ideals just 'cause they're running out of time. I dunno. But by my age, females are supposed to have/want to have a big wedding day, and a gizillion babies. And even if they don't want that, they still want one particular man or woman who will stick by them, make them feel good, treat them well, fall completely in love with them and never leave their side until they die with them.
I don't think I want that. I really, really don't. I often think I do, when I witness friends and family members who are happy having chosen the "domestic" path (God bless you Doctor for coining that phrase!) But in all honesty, I just don't. I don't want to have to rely on one person to make me feel whole. I want to feel whole myself, and be close to others and spend my time earning money doing something I enjoy and spending the earnings on memories rather than families and houses that will fall to bits anyway and I want to have fun and travel and love and be loved and meet amazing unique people and make the most of having this body, as wonky and "overly feminine" as it is. :p
Woah.
x