gemsybobsy: (devy)
"Dog on bed dog on floor dog on chair dog on bed dog on floor SIT STAY DOG"

"I'm very nearly on holiday!! all paid work is done, my house is CLEAN, my laundry is DONE. just need to do SOMETHING with the heap of crap on my dining table. Jebus balls, how on earth did I ever think I could live in a studio flat i do not know. But yeah. HOLIDAY. Got Earthling on full blast (to drown out annoying dog over the lane who YAPS AT EVERY NOISE I MAKE FFS) and am going to put on some makeups and fresh clobes and HIT THE TOWN. and THEN, I will be on holiday. OH YISSSSSSSS"

"right, didz and me are going on holiday bye"
(NOTE: I actually had a week's holiday in July. I will maybe do a separate post about this)
Read more... )
"Travel time from to last dog drop off -> new flat = 1 minute.
Travel time from last dog drop off -> current house = hour and a half ARHGSKDHIUGHA SFCA
Actually going to get really ratty with it now because I know I'm moving, hahaha"
gemsybobsy: (study in pink)
(NOTE: Facebook culture makes it look like I'm less better at writing things and grammar and that. I'm still quite clever though okay? I'm amazed I can still HTML)

"This week is tiles & grouting week at Mutts & Mops! So if you'd like sparkling tiles & bright white grout, tough balls - I can't fit you in"

"lovely day was lovely and productive and apparently I come 'highly recommended' and 'at least 3 or 4 people have said you're the best dog walker round here'"

"Didz is eating his birthday bone. This time last year I was assisting in the birth of the puppies that were the result of his last birthday bone"

"the beard is in my house!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
He's a twat though, for four reasons.
1. Schnauzers PACE if they're somewhere new and can't figure out the best place to lie so they can see all the doors (watchdogs, who'd 'ave 'em)
2. THE NOISE, OH THE NOISE. SHUT UP FLOYD. Those beards are too vocal.
3. The water. The drinking, and the beard drippings. Kitchen needs wet floor sign.
4. STUBBORN. 'No I'm not really up for getting in the car, haha, look at you getting pissed off, I'm just gonna stand in the road and dance around, lalala, hahaha up yours everyone, this beard do what he wants.'

"So many muse t-shirts on the tube. Can't stop lolling. WE HAVE ARRIVED AT PANIC STATION! — with Gemsy Davison."

"Well, my new library book appears to be about dogging. I picked it up after a quick glance told me it was set in modern England and it appeared to be a kind of shady, criminal-world kind of story. The tale is set up in the first chapter, with the guy describing his 'alternative lifestyle'... guy is then setting out to meet Gary and Sheena in the 'kennel' with his kit bag full of... "Oh," I think, "I wonder why he needs condoms?" I didn't even notice the fact that the book has a picture of a lady removing her bra as seen through a car window... had only vaguely registered that the book is called 'Isle of Dogs'... Conclusion: I am so very asexual."

"If there's one thing I know how to do well in my life, it's how to live successfully with packs of dogs:
- Always keep something going - music, a fan, the telly... so there's constant sound. If you sit in silence, a single external noise will set one of them off (most likely the SCHNAUZER) and you'll have a barkfest on your hands (hence the constant stream of Bowie videos shared on the pack manager's Facebook profile over the past week);
- When (not if) you find yourself in the midst of a barkfest, stay calm, breathe evenly, say 'thank you dogs, you are all just so fantastic at barking, well done' and usher them all back to where they were lying down. If this fails, shout 'FOR GOD SAKE SHADDUP, NOBODY CARES! and throw plates at them;
- If there's dissension in the ranks about who gets to sit next to you on the sofa, nobody's allowed. Boot them all off and stretch out, yo;
- Don't even bother with showing them attention unless you've got one on his own at a distance from all the others, unless you want more chaos;
- Air freshener."

"Berlin ist geil. — at Alexanderplatz am Fernsehturm, Berlin"

"welp. today was first day back to the day job and i am borked and fed up and waaah and tummy achey because it turns out dreams divide are collectively best powered by berlinese beer and ice cream.
can you believe, right, that the main reason I wanted to go to berlin all my life (well, since i was 16ish and going around wearing long black coats and reading books about "proper" music anyway) was pretty much because
- "i want to go to berlin because iggy pop and david bowie". i have now been to berlin eleventyseven times and still haven't made my rock pilgrimage to Hansa studios and drank from the goblet of rock at 'the hall by the wall'. next time damnit.
other reasons tho:
- "i want to go to berlin because night clubbin, real night clubbin" which i have done plenty of
- "i want to go to berlin because deutsch ist geil" which it is even though i still suck at it. mein Hund ist ein Mittelschnauzer and er hat ein Schnauzer
- "i want to go to berlin because ZOO" which we sort of visited this time but i was sad because no moar Knut
- "i want to go to berlin because everyone everywhere in germany loves depeche mode so no surprise coldplay/sc*uting for g*rls in any public space" which is true
also beer.
i miss germany"

"A continuation of the weirdness that is my life - customer texts and says there's some chocolate on the table for me. I gets there expecting IDK a bar of dairy milk or something, it's a huge box of posh gourmet chocolates all done up in posh wrapping paper and a gigantic bow. Next to them a note saying, 'Wondered if you'd get any use out of these hair straighteners? If not pass them on to a friend!' They're fackin' GHDs, yo."

"Housesitting always remind me of so many things I'd forgotten existed. Dishwashers! Sky TV! Branston pickle with cold chicken! Dairylea triangles! Pringles! Nice fancy yoghurts! This time is awesome 'cause it's Mum's house so I can eat it all."

"oops Dreams Divide broke da amp at the The Winchester Gate"
gemsybobsy: (barrowmaaan)
"I told a dog to 'shut his bone-hole' today. Still laughing. I'm so hilarious"

"I love driving in the snow I love doggies I love dosh I love dancing I love dusting I love dreams divide I love my LIFE!"

"Darn collie now trying to take over my pillow! Heard this sleepy 'nfff' sound of a nose in my ear, then whacked in the head by a cheesy paw"

"Didz is so ripped. He is proof that everyone needs to eat bones and run really fast in huge circles to stay fit."

"Well, good gig, but my voice died in the first song just fml forever, srsly I can't drive or fit into my stage clothes or even bloomin sing. Haha still buzzing tho, hell yeah. I just lol and carry on tbh cuz I can cuz we are dreams divide damnit"

"only on the muse board does a thread called 'positive thoughts' turn into a discussion about dead animals"

"okay so this morning I woke up and saw a coin on the floor and I was thinking, 'ooh there's a coin, I need a coin' and then couldn't remember what I needed one for, then I remembered - I needed one to undo the screws in the air conditioning unit that would help me escape the meat locker that the cannibals locked me in in the walking dead game."

"You know those random words you buy in all the homeware departments of shops and tesco's and that? They're made of wood or metal and say things like LOVE and HOME and BATH, for some lame reason. Well I would like some of those. Dad can you make me some out of your driftwood please? xxx but I would like them to say things like TWAT and NOOB."

"THINGS I never thought I'd be thinking to myself in 2013: "I must remember to pick up a copy of David Bowie's new album"
gemsybobsy: (space)
No idea how to say how much the gig rocked. How about some CAPS?


That should do it.

I tend to tell Twitter and Facebook everything before I tell this journal these days. That's kinda sad I think? It certainly doesn't say much for my attention sp


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June 2016

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