Dec. 31st, 2013

gemsybobsy: (study in pink)
(NOTE: Facebook culture makes it look like I'm less better at writing things and grammar and that. I'm still quite clever though okay? I'm amazed I can still HTML)

"This week is tiles & grouting week at Mutts & Mops! So if you'd like sparkling tiles & bright white grout, tough balls - I can't fit you in"

"lovely day was lovely and productive and apparently I come 'highly recommended' and 'at least 3 or 4 people have said you're the best dog walker round here'"



"Didz is eating his birthday bone. This time last year I was assisting in the birth of the puppies that were the result of his last birthday bone"

"the beard is in my house!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
He's a twat though, for four reasons.
1. Schnauzers PACE if they're somewhere new and can't figure out the best place to lie so they can see all the doors (watchdogs, who'd 'ave 'em)
2. THE NOISE, OH THE NOISE. SHUT UP FLOYD. Those beards are too vocal.
3. The water. The drinking, and the beard drippings. Kitchen needs wet floor sign.
4. STUBBORN. 'No I'm not really up for getting in the car, haha, look at you getting pissed off, I'm just gonna stand in the road and dance around, lalala, hahaha up yours everyone, this beard do what he wants.'

"So many muse t-shirts on the tube. Can't stop lolling. WE HAVE ARRIVED AT PANIC STATION! — with Gemsy Davison."

"Well, my new library book appears to be about dogging. I picked it up after a quick glance told me it was set in modern England and it appeared to be a kind of shady, criminal-world kind of story. The tale is set up in the first chapter, with the guy describing his 'alternative lifestyle'... guy is then setting out to meet Gary and Sheena in the 'kennel' with his kit bag full of... "Oh," I think, "I wonder why he needs condoms?" I didn't even notice the fact that the book has a picture of a lady removing her bra as seen through a car window... had only vaguely registered that the book is called 'Isle of Dogs'... Conclusion: I am so very asexual."

"If there's one thing I know how to do well in my life, it's how to live successfully with packs of dogs:
- Always keep something going - music, a fan, the telly... so there's constant sound. If you sit in silence, a single external noise will set one of them off (most likely the SCHNAUZER) and you'll have a barkfest on your hands (hence the constant stream of Bowie videos shared on the pack manager's Facebook profile over the past week);
- When (not if) you find yourself in the midst of a barkfest, stay calm, breathe evenly, say 'thank you dogs, you are all just so fantastic at barking, well done' and usher them all back to where they were lying down. If this fails, shout 'FOR GOD SAKE SHADDUP, NOBODY CARES! and throw plates at them;
- If there's dissension in the ranks about who gets to sit next to you on the sofa, nobody's allowed. Boot them all off and stretch out, yo;
- Don't even bother with showing them attention unless you've got one on his own at a distance from all the others, unless you want more chaos;
- Air freshener."

"Berlin ist geil. — at Alexanderplatz am Fernsehturm, Berlin"
"SEXY ROBOTS


"welp. today was first day back to the day job and i am borked and fed up and waaah and tummy achey because it turns out dreams divide are collectively best powered by berlinese beer and ice cream.
can you believe, right, that the main reason I wanted to go to berlin all my life (well, since i was 16ish and going around wearing long black coats and reading books about "proper" music anyway) was pretty much because
- "i want to go to berlin because iggy pop and david bowie". i have now been to berlin eleventyseven times and still haven't made my rock pilgrimage to Hansa studios and drank from the goblet of rock at 'the hall by the wall'. next time damnit.
other reasons tho:
- "i want to go to berlin because night clubbin, real night clubbin" which i have done plenty of
- "i want to go to berlin because deutsch ist geil" which it is even though i still suck at it. mein Hund ist ein Mittelschnauzer and er hat ein Schnauzer
- "i want to go to berlin because ZOO" which we sort of visited this time but i was sad because no moar Knut
- "i want to go to berlin because everyone everywhere in germany loves depeche mode so no surprise coldplay/sc*uting for g*rls in any public space" which is true
also beer.
i miss germany"

"A continuation of the weirdness that is my life - customer texts and says there's some chocolate on the table for me. I gets there expecting IDK a bar of dairy milk or something, it's a huge box of posh gourmet chocolates all done up in posh wrapping paper and a gigantic bow. Next to them a note saying, 'Wondered if you'd get any use out of these hair straighteners? If not pass them on to a friend!' They're fackin' GHDs, yo."

"Housesitting always remind me of so many things I'd forgotten existed. Dishwashers! Sky TV! Branston pickle with cold chicken! Dairylea triangles! Pringles! Nice fancy yoghurts! This time is awesome 'cause it's Mum's house so I can eat it all."

"oops Dreams Divide broke da amp at the The Winchester Gate"
gemsybobsy: (devy)
"Dog on bed dog on floor dog on chair dog on bed dog on floor SIT STAY DOG"

"I'm very nearly on holiday!! all paid work is done, my house is CLEAN, my laundry is DONE. just need to do SOMETHING with the heap of crap on my dining table. Jebus balls, how on earth did I ever think I could live in a studio flat i do not know. But yeah. HOLIDAY. Got Earthling on full blast (to drown out annoying dog over the lane who YAPS AT EVERY NOISE I MAKE FFS) and am going to put on some makeups and fresh clobes and HIT THE TOWN. and THEN, I will be on holiday. OH YISSSSSSSS"

"right, didz and me are going on holiday bye"
(NOTE: I actually had a week's holiday in July. I will maybe do a separate post about this)
Read more... )
"Travel time from to last dog drop off -> new flat = 1 minute.
Travel time from last dog drop off -> current house = hour and a half ARHGSKDHIUGHA SFCA
Actually going to get really ratty with it now because I know I'm moving, hahaha"
gemsybobsy: (floyd)
MOVED TO SOUTHAMPTON
DIDZ IS HERE


"Hi Southampton. Anna is a bad-ass! Keep thinking about beautiful Salisbury house sitting all beautiful and empty and cold and dark and alone. Loads of tears today and now"

"love dat southampton city accent
'ummagord, ee's lark a BEAR! uh-thaaay Noofunliiiinds?'"

"Just sed bye to the puppy doogs and am now at the newfie doogs house for the weekend yay noofoondloonds"

"just mopped myself into the lounge and my phone's in the car, how annoying"

"Woo week of shite is over! Woo discharged from the voice lady's clinic! Verdict: its reflux so stop being a fat knacker. She said 'your laughter has such a great tone. I bet your voice is lovely.' Which was nice. Then she gave me the number of the singing coach who does The Voice on telly or summink"

"The voice thingy on the nexus 4 is bloody marvelous I'm using it now lal lol lol it even understand lol lol lol lol lal lal lala lau haha benson get off me no no no you don't climb you naughty boy"

"what I need is two weeks of no cleaning wotsoever so I can establish whether the burning pain in my hips and lower back are just cleaning pains and not arthritis, fibromyalgia, osteonecrosis, cancer of the bone or aliens gestating in my pelvis"

"bailey and sidney
and their new puppy who is ADORABLE
the clumber spaniel called rupert i posted a pic of, i keep forgetting his name tho so it's just 'puppy'
or 'benedict clumberbatch'"

"puppy is killing a runner bean"

"PREPARING OVEN FRIES (i.e. laying them on a tray)
OUT OF NOWHERE, CAT LANDS ON OVEN FRIES"

"And I'm heading into go outdoors for my yearly winter splurge. After this I really MUST STOP SHOPPING. Moving to cheaper gaff was meant to be to pay for tax, not shoes and trees"

"Tell me that I'm didz
take me to the didz
spin my body didz
Heard it all bedidz
what have I bedidz
who are didz"



WATCH THE VIDEO WATCH THE VIDEO WATCH THE VIDEO IT IS ~*~*~*~*~*MY BAND~*~*~*~*~*~*~* SO WHEN I SHARE IT AGAIN WHEN THE EXCITEMENT DIES DOWN A LITTLE BIT IN A COUPLE OF WEEKS TIME AND SOMEONE SAYS,
***OH, IS THIS YOUR BAND GEM***
LET ME PRE-EMPT THAT NOW BY SAYING YES IT'S MYYYYYYYY BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAND SO WATCH IT WATCH IT NOW RIGHT NOW
OH SHIT I LOVE HOW IT SAYS 'CRAP' IN THE URL I AM LOLLING SO HARD
gemsybobsy: (bhuman)
"So glad I put dinner in the slow cooker today. Aaaaaaaaaaargh my life. I seem to say 'I'm having a bit of a nightmare day today' every single day. 'Having a crazy week' every week. Then I say to myself, 'Oh it'll be easier when I've moved to Southampton/got my car back/got less evening dogsitting/less dogs/less extra cleaning...' aaaaaaaand it never gets easier and i dunno what to dooooooooooOOOO"

"Even Didz doesn't wanna get up today. He is still upside down"
Read more... )
"Right that is it, all the Christmas cards I'm going to have time to do have been posted/sent out... so if you don't get one before Christmas Day, it's not because I don't love ya. This is your message:
"Dear you, Merry Christmas! Lots of love from gemgems and didz *kiss* *pawprint*""

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